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Thursday, December 29, 2005 

Only in Canada

Bob and Doug Mackenzie--Canadian stereotypes brought to life.


"You're Canadian? That's weird. I always thought Canadians were nice people."

"If I went to Canada, would people understand me if I spoke only English?"

"You Canadians think you're so much better than us. But you guys club baby seals to death."

"Why are you wearing your winter coat? It's 5 degrees celsius outside. You're Canadian...you should be used to the cold."

"You have no concept of politics because you're Canadian and your government does all your thinking."

These are just some of the many misconceptions people have about me when they find out I'm Canadian. The only one I haven't heard is that we're chronic complainers. Maybe that's because it's not a misconception. It's actually true.

We do complain a lot and we don't even realize it. I never realized it till I moved here. Canadians back home and expats I meet here complain about the obscene wait times in banks...spending 10 minutes in a lineup was unacceptable and evidence of a country rife with bureaucracy. Canadian women have complained about the audacity of public servants calling them "Mrs" instead of the customary "Ms" when their marital status hasn't been divulged. We're even encouraged to complain. A morning radio show rewarded listeners with cash for reporting the largest pothole in the road they'd seen that day so that it could be reported to the Department of Transportation for repairs.

So it comes as no surprise to me today when I read that the Premier of Canada's oil-rich province, (Saudi) Alberta, was giving every Albertan a $400 refund, they complained. Premier Ralph Klein decided to share the wealth amongst his province's residents and will be disbursing $1.4 billion within a couple of weeks. Most other nationalities would be thrilled to get money FROM the government instead of paying them. Not Albertans. Nope. Parents are complaining that their kids will only blow the cash on iPods or clothes they don't need. Even though I'm a complaining Canadian myself, I find this all a bit much.

I think a couple of months living in Moldova or Bangladesh might be the cure for our innate desire to complain.

"You're Canadian? That's weird. I always thought Canadians were nice people."

I'm guessing that comment came from one of the many people you've thrown out of your stores - just a guess!

As for those people in Alberta, I think they should just be beaten with a big stick until they stop complaining and/or die.

OR they could donate their unwanted money to charity instead. Yup, liking plan B better. They should do that.

That's funny. I've always viewed Canadians as tolerant and not willing to complain. I do think they are closet snobs though and have an "inferiority" complex being next to big, bad USA. By closet snobs, I mean they feel they are better and smarter than Americans, though would never dream of verbalizing it.

Do you find that?

You know what's funny. As Pro-American as I am, I can take being lesser than a Canadian. Because it's sort of like being insulted by your Brother. You may not like it but hey, he's still your brother.

Canada is a great friend of America and I'll always love them even though they may get mad at us for eating all the Christmas Turkey or attacking Iraq.

By the way, I love Bob and Doug. My favorite thing regarding them I ever did was once a Cop in Los Angeles was in the drive through of a fast food restaurant and I turned up the volume of my Bob and Doug bit right at the part where one of them says, "HEY COPS, WANT SOME DONUTS". Needless to say, I left quickly since the cop was stuck in the drive through and couldn't chase me...

And, my favorite Canadian movie is "Canadian Bacon". I really love the part where they litter all over the Canadian side of the border as a way to start a pre-emptive war with Canada.

Seawitch, I left a comment for you about Canada in the past, but forgot where it was and now I can't find it.

Blame Canada, Blame Canada... ....

Ellas...When I read the article, I thought the same thing...why not give the money to charity if they have such a problem with their kids buying things. As for the comment about my (lack of) niceness...yes, that comment I hear at the stores. LOL

Ethno...I really don't know where that tolerance tag came from. We really aren't that tolerant when it comes to rude or impolite behaviour. For instance, my home city is actually two cities joined together by two bridges. Every day at rush hour, the traffic towards the bridges is heavy. If someone were to cut me off on one of the many sidestreets leading to the main lane onramp of the bridge...someone will have a fit with that offending driver even if I don't. If I'm laughing at a Newfie joke (sort of like Pontios jokes here) another person who overhears it will inform the joke teller that it's not right to make fun of Newfies...even though my mother, who is a Newfie, is laughing too and not the least bit offended.But you're right...many Canadians feel superior to Americans and they do verbalize it...usually in the form of backhanded compliments like this:
Most Americans are great people even if they're not as educated as we are. LOL

Scruff...I thought Canadian Bacon and South Park are too funny. My fave scene in Canadian Bacon is when the truck Candy's driving has anti-Canadian graffiti sprayed all over it and the cop pulls him over. Thinking that he's about to be ticketed for the graffiti, he starts to apologize but the cop lets him know that Canada is bilingual so he must spray paint the graffiti in French as well as English. :-)

Ethno...I guess I should add that our tolerance usually refers to our tolerance of other people. We just don't tolerate 'bad' behaviour. I think I mentioned in another Canada post that we don't really need cops because we rat each other out anyway. LOL

"You're Canadian? That's weird. I always thought Canadians were nice people."

How could anyone not see you as nice?

Me and my cousin once tried to replicate the time Bob and Doug drank all that beer at the beer factory but we got full before we could make our clothes fill out.

Bob and Doug were my heroes during my high school days (ooh I'm dating myself).

I think that I must have called everyone in my whole school a HOSER at least once.

Oh, and I forgot to tell you. When we went to Niagara Falls, I asked the Canadians if it was true that they were going to move the falls due to budget cuts. I had heard that. I said it with a straight face and I think they actually took me seriously and told me, "OH, that's not really true, and then explained how you really couldn't move the falls physically etc). I played dumb and now gave some more fuel to the fire about how dumb Americans are.

Hey, I do what I can to give Canadians some more self-confidence.

So, Seawitch, why don't you TAKE OFF, you HOSER!

Niko...flattery will get you everywhere. LOL I've asked myself how such a rumour circulated about my un-niceness and when I find the culprit, I'll fix his little red wagon. LOL

Scruff...now where did you get the idea that Canadians were lacking in self-confidence. Only Canadians would laugh at a song devoted to blaming them. Imagine if it was "Blame Greece" or "Blame France". What a stink that would be. LOL

"You're Canadian? That's weird. I always thought Canadians were nice people."

Sure there's a compliment there... somewhere

NEWFIES ARE BETTER THEN ALBERTA PEOPLE!!!!!!!! IM NEWFIE B`Y

ALBERTA PEOPLE ONLY MAKES FUN OF US CUZ WE GETS JOBS IN ALBERTA THEY CANT GET JOBS CUZ THERE TOO LAZY NEWFIES ARE BETTER GO DIE IN A HOLE ALBERTA PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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