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Tuesday, November 23, 2004 

Alexander the Gay?

This week, 25 Greek lawyers sent a letter to Warner Bros. studios telling them to make sure they let audiences know that the movie "Alexander" is a work of fiction and that Alexander the Great did not engage in homosexual sex.

Thank God. For a week now, I couldn't figure out why our personal lawyer is not returning our calls relating to our company. She was probably far too busy with those other 25 lawyers suing a director for a movie they've never even seen.

Imagine that, an ancient Greek having homosexual sex. The nerve of some people making a movie about someone no living person has ever seen and of whom there are a thousand different opinions about his life. These lawyers are no doubt 'in the know'. It only stands to reason that they'd write such a letter because they talked to Alexander himself last week and he said he never had homosexual sex. Most likely, the other 25 lawyers have the affidavit signed by Alexander stating his virginity before marriage, his heterosexuality and his penchant for healing the sick, raising the dead and walking on water.

If these lawyers don't get Warner Bros. to cave to their demands, the world will stop spinning on its axis and it we will all be incinerated by the wrath of Zeus and his lightning bolts.

Pixar better watch it. Shark Tale will soon be released in Greece and if they haven't written the disclaimer ' this movie is a work of fiction and that sea creatures don't possess human language capabilities" then they may end up getting sued by the Colossal Squid, Esq. off the coast of New Zealand.

(This blog is a work of fiction and is only the views expressed herein, are those of the author alone. This blog does not encourage or condone the use of lightning bolts by Zeus and persons close to Zeus. No Olympic Gods were harmed in the writing of this blog.)

My, my, my! You are a persistent, provocative and prolific little blogger aren't you? :-) I just wanted you to know that I read all of your rants. Unfortunately, I don't have time to respond in depth to each and every one although I find myself wanting to write an editorial comment next to every sentence! You raise a lot of interesting points in your blogs. I think you're doing a wonderful job. I always start my day checking out what's rattling through that mausoleum of a mind of yours. I laugh. I cry. I shake my head in disbelief. You MIGHT just convince me to start a counterpoint blog! Keep on truckin' you little Greek Goddess of Gab!!

HRH QUEEN BEE

You are amazing, talk about total fantasy. Imagine a Greek guy having sex with another man. There is no such thing as a Greek who is gay, it's a world known medical fact. Has no-one told you this.

I am now going to quote from the sacred durex survey (which I was rewarded for all my efforts with an mp3 player.... I'm not bragging though) which states that Greek men have the second most amount of sex in the world. At the same time, another survey carried out states that Greek women aren't getting much sex at all. So the evidence says it all. There is no way Greek men have sex with other men. I hope this puts the matter to rest once and for all.

Oh and PS: tell your hubbie, same time same place Friday night.

please don't start on the Elgin Marbles!

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